WHAT IS SOCIAL INTELLIGENCE (EQ) AND WHY DOES IT MATTER? (PART 2)

Social intelligence is closely related to emotional intelligence (EQ). Our emotions evolved to serve a social purpose that enables us, as humans, to survive. The ability to recognize friend from foe, to return our nervous system to a state of balanced equilibrium and to feel loved and happy is essential.

 

1. Mindfulness practice builds self-awareness as it reduces stress

Mindfulness is the practice of purposely focusing your attention on the present moment and without judgment. The cultivation of mindfulness has roots in Buddhism, but most religions include some type of similar prayer or meditation technique. Mindfulness helps shift your preoccupation with thought toward an appreciation of the moment, physical and emotional  (EQ) sensations and brings a larger perspective on life. Mindfulness calms and focuses you, making you more self- aware in the process.

 

2. Key skill 2: Self-management

Being emotionally aware is just the first step to emotional (EQ) management. In order for you to engage your emotional intelligence, you must also be able use your emotions to make constructive decisions about your behavior. When you become overly stressed, you can lose control of your emotions (EQ) and the ability to act thoughtfully and appropriately.

Think about a time when you have been overwhelmed by stress. Was it easy to think clearly or make a rational decision?.
Probably not. This is because while your brain can manage feeling and thinking at the same time, when we become overly stressed, our ability to both think clearly and accurately assess emotions (EQ) , our own and other people’s, becomes compromised.
 

Emotions are important pieces of information that tell us about ourselves and others but in the face of stress that takes us out of our comfort zone, we can become overwhelmed and lose control of ourselves. With the ability to manage stress and stay emotionally (EQ) present you can learn to receive disturbing pieces of information without letting this information override your thoughts and self-control. You will be able to make choices that allow you to control impulsive feelings and behaviors, manage your emotions (EQ)  in healthy ways, take initiative, follow through on commitments and adapt to changing circumstances.
<<< Read more >>> Criticsm of emotional intelligence measures of assessment
 

3. Key skill 3: Social awareness

Social awareness is the skill needed to pick up on the largely nonverbal cues others constantly send. These cues speak to the emotions (EQ) others are experiencing and give you a more precise idea of their experience what is truly important to them. When groups of people send out similar nonverbal cues, you are able to read and understand shared joint experiences. In order to do these things, you will have to know how to suspend your thoughts in order to experience nonverbal cues that change form one moment to the next. Ironically, not thinking about goals and objectives when with other people is what you need to further those objectives.

   

4. Mindfulness is an ally of emotional (EQ) and social awareness

Social awareness is a moment to moment experience that can not take place while we are thinking about something else. When we are in our heads, planning the future or analyzing the past we can not be present in the moment. This makes it especially difficult to pick up on subtle nonverbal cues. The myth of multitasking must be ignored. Although we can switch subject very quickly, when we do so, we miss the subtle emotional shift (EQ), taking place in other people that help us to understand them.

• We are actually more likely to futher our social goals and objectives by settings our thoughts, intentions and goals aside in social situations and instead, focusing on the interaction itself. Moment to moment social awareness is an empowering personal process;

• Following the flow of another person’s emotional (EQ) responses is a give and take process that requires us to also pay attention to the flow of our own emotional (EQ) experience;

• A common fear is that by paying attention to others we diminish self-awareness but the opposite is really true. We gain self-awareness by taking the time and putting in the effort to pay attention to others.

Paying attention to what you experience emotionally (EQ) as you listen to others also illuminates your own belief and values. It is easy to mouth popular ideas and values that may not really be a good fit for you. But when you feel discomfort hearing others express these views, you have learned something important about yourself and emotional intelligence (EQ).

<<< Next >>> What is social intelligence (EQ) and why does it matter? 

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